Russell's Breathe Melodies for Dads experience - Breathe
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Russell’s Breathe Melodies for Dads experience

Tue 16 Jun

Russell, a first-time dad joined our Breathe Melodies for Dads pilot programme with his son when he was a baby. Hear his story below.

For me, one difficult part of early fatherhood was bonding with my child and understanding what that was meant to feel like. In our case, my partner had already had that strong physical connection through pregnancy and breastfeeding. I had emotional moments before he was born, especially hearing his heartbeat at the ultrasounds, but when he was actually born, that was when it really started for me.

It felt like nothing I had experienced before, and I didn’t really know how to feel. It was a strange and overwhelming feeling: becoming a dad, bonding with my son, and trying to understand what that new role felt like emotionally. I think navigating that can be hard if you don’t have other dads to talk to and Breathe Melodies for Dads gave an ideal space for that.

I decided to sign up for the programme mainly because it was dads only. There are not a lot of dad-only groups or events, so I wanted to try those kinds of things as much as possible, partly to see how they could help and partly to meet other people in the same situation. A lot of other events for parents in general are more like stay-and-play sessions. Those are useful too, but this felt very different.

It was a strange and overwhelming feeling: becoming a dad, bonding with my son, and trying to understand what that new role felt like emotionally. I think navigating that can be hard if you don’t have other dads to talk to and Breathe Melodies for Dads gave an ideal space for that.

I felt a bit apprehensive to sing at first, but it became much easier when everyone was doing it together and the sessions were guided really well by the musicians too. Sometimes everyone would sing the same part, and other times smaller groups would sing different parts of the song that then combined into the whole thing. That made it feel easy to join in, because you were being led through it rather than having to figure it out yourself, so you did not have to overthink it or have much chance to feel awkward — you could just go along with it.

If I ever felt any apprehension about the singing, I found it helped to look down at my baby in my arms or on my lap and just sing to him. That made it 10x easier, because it became about singing and bonding with him rather than worrying about anyone else in the room.

The music was interesting, because they were often songs I had never heard before, or had beats and rhythms that were new to me. I also liked that the musicians explained the songs they were using and why they had chosen them. That made the experience feel more interesting and gave more meaning to what we were singing.

I really enjoyed the sessions, and I know that through everything I was doing at the time I felt happy and more confident. I think it validated me more as a dad.

Music and singing are really engaging. Music can trigger strong positive emotions, and it can be relaxing and fun. You don’t even have to be good at it. Some of the songs were just humming tunes, but even that felt good.

I’m no expert, but even though the babies likely won’t consciously remember the sessions, I think that those kinds of musical, emotional experiences still become part of your bond. Singing with and to your child is probably a lot more powerful than we know, and I definitely sing to my son more now.

Unrelated to the singing, one memory that stands out is my son suddenly throwing up on me during a session! The facilitators and other dads were great at helping out and helping me clean up, which they really didn’t have to do. It was a funny moment looking back, but also a nice example of the kind of supportive atmosphere in the room.

Breathe Melodies for Dads gave me a safe and regular space to talk to other dads, ask questions, share experiences, and get support. It also reinforced how much music can affect your mood. I already knew that, but experiencing it in that setting, with other dads and babies, really brought it home.

Breathe Melodies for Dads is for the dad, specifically. It’s for their mental health. And THAT is unique.

I really enjoyed the sessions, and I know that through everything I was doing at the time I felt happy and more confident. I think it validated me more as a dad. The fact that an organisation wanted to take the time to do dad-specific things, to support the wellbeing of the dads, and to give them a space to feel supported meant a lot, because generationally dads have not always done this kind of thing as standard.

The programme is unique. Not only in the way that I’ve not seen something like it before, but in the fact that it’s not just for your baby. Most, if not all other baby-related things I’ve been to, have been about the baby. Or maybe the baby and the mum. But Breathe Melodies for Dads is for the dad, specifically. It’s for their mental health. And THAT is unique. Bringing your baby along is almost secondary to the fact that it’s there to support the wellbeing of the dads, and to give them a space to feel supported. Of course, it’s building the bond between dad and baby, but it’s primarily for the dad, and that’s amazing.

If dads feel more confident doing father-related things and know how to deal with some of the emotions that come with that, then they can be a better support to mums as well. That relieves stress for them too, so it helps everyone. I think we are moving away from the idea that everyone has very defined roles in parenting. Everyone is trying to do a lot more of everything now, and dads are going to need some help doing that!

We will be running new in-person Breathe Melodies for Dads programmes on Saturdays in South London later in 2026, as well as an online programme for participants nationwide.

Please register your interest HERE and we will get back in touch with you once schedules are confirmed.